It started out as a joke, but the more I looked at my naked body in the mirror the more I believed my knees were all wrong. I've got big thighs for my frame, a holdover from playing soccer as a kid, I built up all that muscle and then let it go to pasture … Continue reading My Knees Are in the Wrong Place
Yesterday I wrote about a traumatizing moment in my life. A keystone moment, the kind that causes ripples years later, and I found myself unable to pinpoint the decisions which delivered me to that moment. How did it begin? How did I wind up in a situation in which I had no options but to … Continue reading Do You Remember?
This morning I wrote 1400 words about the most traumatic moment of my life. Something that happened 30 years ago. Something that has stayed with me all this time. I wrote it all down and I didn't cry and I don't feel angry and that feels like progress. It feels like vindication.
I moved to Providence 20 years ago and moved away four years later and while I've been back to visit on a few occasions, this time was somehow different. Derek and his buddy were running a race downtown, the start line near the mall where I used to work. I couldn't stop taking photos of … Continue reading Providence
I was fourteen at the time. Or was it fifteen? I was somewhere in between fourteen and fifteen because sometimes our age isn’t a direct correlation to the calendar. It’s not important. I was young, an almost or already sophomore in high school when I wrote a letter to the studio that produced the television … Continue reading I’m Not Proud of Myself
This week has been a rough one for writing. I've started about ten essays only to find when I've reached the 1500 word count mark that what I am looking at is garbage. I went for a run today to clear my head and try and figure out what the issue is and I think … Continue reading Contaminated
I took an oil painting class in college. It was a required course for my BFA in studio arts and I dreaded every moment of it. Mostly because two dimensional art is not my strength, but also because my professor was vague and I needed structure. The first few classes focused on mixing paint on … Continue reading Scumbling
If I start a new habit on a Monday morning it will stick. This is what I tell myself on Sunday night as I imagine how productive I will be if I just get up when the alarm goes off instead of hitting snooze. If I just get up after the third time I've hit … Continue reading What If?
Traveling is a little scary for me. Not in a debilitating sort of way, more in an anticipatory way. Like when you receive a present from a person who doesn’t know you very well. Presents are great, I love them, when you hand me a wrapped package chances are I am doing some pretty impressive … Continue reading I’ll Take the Road Less Traveled, But Only if There’s Good Food
When I worked in an office I eventually fell into a morning ritual. Wake up, hit snooze, wake up, snooze again, wake up, shower, eat cereal, stare at glowing rectangle, get in car, drive, arrive, remove coat, turn on computer, collect mug, go to staff kitchen, make tea, discuss what was watched the evening before, … Continue reading Structure Is Hard